The book and its message resonates with me even till this day to the point that when ever I think about people motivations - whether they be political, social, spiritual or financial - I always bring it back to humans need for status.
This is particularly interesting as a parent of teenagers who are grappling with what the future holds for them.
Common questions and not so obvious musings of young people may include (in nor particular order)
- What kind of marks do I need in High School?
- what university degree should I do?
- What job will I have?
- Who will be my life partner (if any)?
- Where will I live - country, city, suburb?
- What type of place will I live in (house, apartment etc)?
- How will I afford a certain lifestyle?
- Why are we here anyway?
- Are my parents lives representative of what awaits me?
Without them knowing, and in my purely subjective opinion (anyway) I think these all relate to the notion of status and how will they achieve it.
Why is this important as a parent? Lets use an example
Question: Dad - why should I get a good mark at school when the media reckons that most University degrees are a waste of bloody time?
On the face of it we could be tempted to write off the question as just another example of teenage angst. The question is a good one. At no point in near history have the links between a university education and getting a real job been so tenuous.
Soooooooo........I've been grappling with an answer somewhere along the lines of
"Look daughter/son you are right that you are part of a system - designed at the beginnings of the industrial revolution - that is beginning to look seriously outdated. The problem you have (and the risk you run) is that without a university education and a brilliant plan b - you are destined to live a life of 'catch up', always trying to prove to others - amongst a cohort of family, friends and acquaintances - that you are are actually quite smart and you could have gone to college and smashed education if you wanted".
Thats plenty of painful conversations over many years with many different people. Any future partner you have you are going to have to explain yourself (not to mention your future partner now has to explain your choices to future mother and father in laws)...
You see - not working hard at school is a dangerous game - despite the supremely rational concept behind it. Your status is potentially screwed and you run the risk of not being heard by anyone going forward. Ever told a joke that is a ripper and yet in some company no one laughs - now you feel the pain!
The only way a young person can decide to not take school too seriously and yet have status moving forward is to have some damm good plan b options.
Examples (notice the word super not 'fairly good').
1. Super rich tech entrepreneur (yes I dropped out of college)
2. Super good looking (Steel blue)
3. Super good at something like sport or art (Ronaldo hated school)
Bottom line is - understand early the role of status plays in dominance hierarchy and make decisions accordingly.
Now how to explain to the kids???
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